


you construct intricate rituals

by Kandiszucker (whatwhy)



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Closeted Character, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, In the Beginning, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-16
Updated: 2018-12-16
Packaged: 2019-09-20 05:03:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,245
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17016258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whatwhy/pseuds/Kandiszucker
Summary: Every once in a while, Martin sticks his nose out of the closet.





	you construct intricate rituals

I. THERE was nothing weird about letting Enrique touch him. It was what straight guys his age did. All Enrique offered him was advice and guidance, answers to the questions he was too afraid to ask anyone else. How did French kisses work? Did prostate stimulation - he did not use that exact term - really feel nice? What was it like to be on the receiving end of a blowjob?

But more often than not, all he got was really just a glimpse of the real deal, no satisfaction. Touching himself while thinking of Enrique became a common occurrence.

Judging from Reddit, he was not the only straight guy whom Enrique left frustrated.

 

II. HYUKKYU positively made his heart melt. Initially, Martin only adored his clean Ezreal, vowing to study and copy his playstyle thoroughly in the hopes of becoming just half as good as him. Then, OGN’s camera staff showed his face, and Martin was smitten.

Hyukkyu was objectively adorable. It was not just his looks, though they helped. It was his soft and gentle demeanor, the very core of his being.

That’s why Martin let himself get carried away and told their interviewer he would kiss Hyukkyu if he were a girl. Later that night he wondered why, if this was the only condition, he  _ wasn’t _ kissing him. Hyukkyu must have been wondering the same thing, because when he went to his hotel room to wish Hyukkyu a good night, he suddenly found Hyukkyu’s soft lips on his own. It was a chaste, almost timid kiss that only lasted for a split second, but to Martin’s shock it was a thousand times more intense than any kiss he had shared with the girls at his school.

It explained everything.

But he knew that this explanation bore a realization, and this realization bore nothing but trouble. Coping with it was something for his future self to do.

 

III. PRESENTLY, his future self had the pleasure and the burden of living and working together with Yeujin. It was a miracle they kept their split perfect. Yeujin with his doe eyes, cherry red lips, pixie smile was too tempting. Not only was he drop dead gorgeous, he also had a tragic backstory.

That was not an excuse for Martin to hold his hand, or to hug him whenever the opportunity arose, or to rub Yeujin’s back as he fell asleep in Martin’s bed. Comforting him in his time of mourning was Martin’s duty as a teammate. Nothing more.

 

IV. IT was only him and Fabian now. But that was alright, Martin found, because Fabian was sunshine incarnate. Always a joke on his lips, always a comment or a gesture to brighten the mood - not always voluntarily - Martin found himself drawn to him like a moth to the flame. It was kind of like the crushes he read about in his books all the time, he thought, until he realized that, oh fuck, this was a crush.

It was hard to tell, given Fabian’s overall maturity, whether he returned Martin’s feelings or whether he was still stuck in that “girls have cooties” phase so characteristic of prepubescent boys. Martin decided to test his luck only a little.

 

V. PART of testing his luck came in the shape of Snapchat. He had been fooling around with Fabian all evening before he, still giddy and giggly, decided to announce to the world that he was versatile, giving his camera a look he thought to be seductive for good measure. As soon as he had added the picture to his story, his blood froze. Had he really -

Frantically, he opened its stats. He had to do  _ something _ . The League of Legends community was, by and large, not exactly known for being particularly left-leaning. But some one hundred and twenty people had already opened his story. Deleting it would be even more suspicious than keeping it up. He decided that an excuse was needed.

An excuse was found.

 

VI. ALTHOUGH Fabian had made fun of Martin’s Snapchat story with great enthusiasm, he invited him along on his vacation. He didn’t seem to mind having a naked Martin in his bed at all. Was it because he was used to sleeping naked himself? Was it because ever since Rotterdam, when Martin had asked some girls to join them to make his designs on Fabian a little less obvious, there was no shame between them anymore anyway?

Was it because Fabian returned his feelings?

They had kissed before, back in Rotterdam, and Fabian had been so eager. So why was there this strange shift in atmosphere when Martin kissed him on their last day in Turkey?

 

VII. THEIR rivalry had existed for as long as Martin could remember. Sometimes he wondered if Kostas had already been his sworn enemy way before Martin had ever touched League.

Kostas had been born godless into the nation at the foot of Mount Olympus, raised Greek Orthodox, and, upon reaching bodily maturity, had come to the conclusion again that there was no God beside himself. Martin, when he was not currently suffering from one of his increasingly frequent bouts of self-loathing, was similarly self-opinionated. But the more Martin thought about it, the more facets he noticed about the tension between them. If only he could get closer…

His loss to Kostas provided a decent enough excuse to ask him for his jersey. Kostas looked at him as though he was out of his mind, but when Martin pointed out that this was very much a thing in traditional sports, Kostas shrugged and pulled his shirt over his head.

Martin tried not to stare too hard. Whatever humiliation Kostas would cook up if he caught him, he could do without.

 

VIII. HE was never quite sure if he wanted to be Mads or bed Mads. Mads embodied everything Martin strived to be: kind, patient, disciplined, hard-working, easy to get along with… Granted, one might have called Mads boring, or lame, even. But whenever Mads touched him, in the most innocent way possible, it sent Martin’s mind reeling with all those conflicting feelings. Did he feel safe or intimidated in the presence of this giant? Chastely loved or viscerally horny?

Mads got himself a girlfriend before Martin could figure himself out. Loath though he was to admit it, Mads was as lucky to have her as she was to have him. Besides, Mads worshiped her earnestly. And who could possibly wish someone like Mads ill?

 

IX. RASMUS had always been a fanboy. His first night at the gaming house, he showed Martin his pride and joy: A jersey Martin had signed years ago…

Naturally, Rasmus responded to all of his advances with excitement. Half of the time, it was even Rasmus who initiated the fooling-around. Martin moving into his own apartment gave them more privacy.

More intimacy.

They grew so accustomed to being skin-on-skin close to each other that they never noticed it carried over to when they were with their teammates. Or on stage. What did they care? This was their normal now.

Rasmus was young, inexperienced, and full of questions. Martin was more than glad to answer every single one. In a way, he had become his Enrique.

What did he feel for Rasmus? And did Rasmus return it? It wasn’t important. Rasmus made him happy, and he obviously made Rasmus happy in return. That was the only thing that mattered.

Martin prayed that it would never end.

**Author's Note:**

> Proof of Caps having been a fanboy since the dawn of time: [[x](https://www.flickr.com/photos/lolesports/14297805000/)]  
> My pal [NekoKomu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NekoKomu/pseuds/NekoKomu) and I compared the birthmarks and we're 99.95% sure it's him.


End file.
